Julia Lynn Caudill
4 Nov 1969 - 27 December 2005
Julie sent a message to all of us through Mike. This candle was a wedding present to them on their wedding day. It’s brand new, and Julie’s message to us is “Don’t wait to light your candles.” Burning your candles is living your life. You don’t save anything by waiting to do things with your life. Candles are made to be burned. So get out your decorative candles that you have been saving for years and light them up and live your life. You don’t need to burn them at both ends, but light them and enjoy life.
Julie fit more into 36 years than many people fit into twice that time.
She was Adventurous, Independent, and she had a sharp wit that she could turn on at the drop of a hat.
I recall our early years of traveling, camping, swimming, SCUBA Diving, and can’t help but see how Julie kept up living fully for the rest of her life.
Some of the pictures you see here of Julie bear that out. You see her SCUBA Diving in Roatan off the coast of Honduras at the age of 11. She’s been whitewater rafting and tubing, skydiving, bungee jumping, cave exploring, hiking, and mountain climbing, but her real love was being in the water. She was a swimmer, lifeguard, swim instructor,
Aquatic Director, teacher, and kayaker.
I don’t know many other high school kids who would be able to get their little sister to do what Julie did when we both got up waterskiing out on Lake Weir, and she stepped onto the back of my skis, dropped her slalom ski, then climbed up on my shoulders for a picture.
Many of you have remarked on how much Julie and Brad look alike with long hair. I recall a day in Lombard when I was playing in the back yard and looked up to the back porch. I thought I saw my reflection off the back door glass, but I looked again and saw it was Julie. It’s one thing to have someone else remark on how two people look alike, or even for someone to mistake their own identity in a photo 20 years old, but it’s really something when you can make that mistake yourself in real time.
I know how I made the mistake though. Julie had just gotten a very short haircut (still much longer than mine though), and if you know the beautiful long blonde hair she had, you’ll understand that she was a bit sour about losing a lot of it in a haircut she didn’t like.
It wasn’t so much the short hair that caused me to mistake Julie for me. It was the sour expression. The expression didn’t belong on her face and she didn’t look like Julie.
Julie deserved to be happy. Every life she touched, she brought joy to.
After graduating from CFCC, she went up to Jacksonville to earn her degree at UNF. She worked to pay her housing costs while attending school and soon became the Associate Director of the Aquatic Center. She went on to get her Masters Degree.
Julie met Mike 14 years ago. He asked her to marry him on Christmas morning at 1:00 AM after midnight mass in 1998. This Christmas morning he prayed and asked her to please let go.
Many people have expressed their special condolences to Mike and our family that Julie passed so close to Christmas. We have to recognize that Gods plan will not be second guessed. We may not ever understand the reasons some things happen the way they do, but on some occasions, we get a rare glimpse of some of the strings. As Mike told us all in his web postings;
“The timing of Julie’s departing is a wonderful blessing, the joy of everyone’s Christmas Spirit is the sort of mental elixir that has made this all the more special.”
The fact that she held on through Christmas allowed one more year of reading Jacob Marley’s Christmas Carol and Berkeley Breathed’s “Red Ranger Came Calling.”
I’ve prayed with my children every night through Julie’s Cancer that God send a guardian angel to help her win her battle and stay with us. Julie fought with her signature strength and faced every new development with inspiring fortitude. When the brain tumors were discovered she focused on the treatment ahead. When I talked to her on the phone she didn’t complain about the spread of cancer. She was glad they had identified the problem causing her intense headaches because now it could be treated. It was. Julie beat the brain cancer and made it through planning and executing this year’s unprecedented Reckamp family Manatee trip. When the doctor suggested that surgery would be a very difficult experience and recommended Hospice care to avoid the pain, she chose the only option that offered a possible future and went on fighting. When the miracle we all prayed for didn’t happen and the curtain fell on our hopes, the prayers shifted to ask God to do what was necessary for Julie and help her to his solace. Where we prayed for her to have a guardian angel to win her battle, I now know that she is in the ranks of Gods guardian angels that he sends to look over us. When I came to that realization, I recognized that she has been that angel always, even before death. The example of strength and fortitude she provided for all of us who saw her in November in Crystal River and at Kendall’s christening is an example of God working miracles right in front of our eyes.
You see up here the tribute to Julie as Godmother. Julie has been asked to be Godmother to children of four separate couples. Now, we can’t choose who our parents are, and most people are capable of becoming a parent at some point in their life if they choose, but you can’t just choose to become a Godparent. You have to just “be” the first person someone with children thinks about when they want to choose the guardian angel for their children. You have to be loved and trusted as a person with a basic goodness in order to be asked to be a Godparent. Julie did this more than any other person I have ever met in the world.
The line between life and death in her role as angel wasn’t so clear. Mike poetically said that the intense back pain she was having near the end was her wings trying to grow. Julie was diagnosed with Cancer on Mike’s Birthday in 2004. For his birthday, Julie got Mike flying lessons. Among her trips to the hospital and chemotherapy treatments, Mike put the flight lessons on hold. When I saw Julie earlier this month at St. Vincent’s and mentioned the flight simulator setup in their computer room, she told me about them and told me how she was upset that Mike has delayed his lessons. She wanted him to get them done regardless of what she was going through. Now Julie got her wings before him.
But Mike is going to get his wings. If it gets tough to stick to the program, he just needs to think of the example Julie set. Julie gave her life before it should have been half over, it’s up to all of us now to give her life meaning.
There’s a new song by Tim McGraw called “Live Like You Were Dying.” Julie didn’t just do that when she knew the end was near. She did that from the beginning and kept it up through the end. The Manatee trip is a perfect example of what I’ve been saying. Julie was it’s driving force this year to bring us all together there while she was alive. I want us to make the trip a time for us to gather and remember the things Julie still brings into our lives year after year. A time for us to show each other our rare glimpses into what could be Gods plan.
My 10 year old son Daniel told my wife Karen earlier this month that he wished he were older right now because he would be a Scientist and cure cancer so Aunt Julie could live. What’s God’s Plan? We don’t know, but before Julie’s inspiration he was more focused on being a Jedi Knight.
The preceeding was from Doug, Julie's brother
The following was from Mary Koycar, Julies Childhood friend
EULOGY
Julia Lynn Monica Reckamp Caudill
Death: 8:20 pm 12/27/05
Jacksonville Wake: 12/29/05
Ocala Wake: 12/30/05
Funeral Mass & Burial: 12/31/05
Some time ago Julie sent me what I first though was just another chain email. It starts … A pastor was visiting an elderly woman in her home to make arrangements for her memorial service. They talked about the order of the service, the music that would be played and the scripture verses she wanted read.
Finally, she said, "Pastor, when they fix me up and put me in the coffin, I want them to put my bible in one hand and a fork in the other." He asked why such an unusual request. She said, "Well you know how whenever we have potlucks and we eat off paper plates with plastic forks, people always say, 'Save your fork, we still have dessert coming’. Dessert is my favorite part of supper, and there have been so many good desserts over the years. So I keep my fork, because I know the best is yet to come. I want to be buried with a fork in my hand. As the people walk by and see me and wonder why I'm holding a fork, I want you to remind them that this life is just the beginning, and that the best is yet to come."
Today, I have been honored with the blessing of encompassing my best friends life in her eulogy. There are so many things to say about my wonderful friend, there are so many stories to share, but I will keep my words to a few gifts that she gave me while she’s been here on earth; her carefree joy in life, her beautiful relationships with loved ones, and her exemplifying life of faith.
1st GIFT: Carefree Joy In Life
My brothers Mike and John, who were friends with Doug and Brad, introduced me to Julie. My first memory of Julie is meeting her at her back door, with her short curly blond hair, big blue eyes, green corduroy pants, and white t-shirt at 1050 E. Washington Street. She readily accepted me as her friend and introduced me to her Mrs. Beasley Doll. Mrs. Beasley would accompany Julie on her sleepovers to my house and protected us from any of the evil dolls and toys that came to life during the night. Julie kept me entertained with her imagination whenever we played pretend. Julie’s Barbie was a rock star and would sing Olivia Newton John songs while my Barbie did back up. They would date and marry wonderful men like G.I.Joe and Evil Kenivel. We’d get lost into our world of pretend as our brothers conquered evil and saved the town of Lombard with their “Spy Club”.
Julie, like all the Reckamps, was born a fish. She taught me to be a fish also. I would go to her house and Julie’s father would teasingly throw us into the pool with the boys and Holly, the dog, and Julie’s mom would make us lunch. After she moved, we became avid pen pals. We would visit each other and would enjoy swimming in pools, lakes, rivers, water parks, and oceans. We were lucky enough to be dive buddies in the Florida Keys, and in a fresh water cavern near her house. We would plan exciting scuba trips to exotic tropical places that never really came to fruition.
When I got married to my husband, my wedding party included Julie, of course, my cousin Michelle, and our friend Carol. The four of us quickly bonded and we decided to plan an annual trip, which we have done for almost a decade. Among these trip were…1997 white water rafting on the Ocoee River in Tennessee, 1998 Julie’s Graduation with her masters degree, 1999 the Jacksonville’s Kiwanis Mile Ocean Swim (that actually took Julie one mile and not so straight swimmers Michelle and I, however, 2,miles), 2000 Julie & Mike’s Wedding with infamous Reckamp Shark Bait Swim, 2001 Chicago’s Navy Pier, 2002 Water Skiing in Tennessee, 2003 Bungee swinging 1000 ft over the Royal Gorge in Colorado, 2004 the baby shower for my son in Chicago, 2005 St. Augustine in Florida.
2nd GIFT: Her Beautiful Relationships with Loved Ones
Julie loved and respected her parents deeply. She shared her mother’s spontaneity and zest for life and combined it with her dad’s “planning to get the most fun out of life” attitude. Most people would say “no” when their mother suggests skydiving, but not the Recamps. Julie embraced life with the enthusiasm of a daredevil, and the excitement of a child. Julie extended this excitement into all interpersonal relationships, be it family, friends, or pets. She was definitely daddy’s girl always looking forward from input on her dad’s opinions on her life’s decisions.
She cherished her grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins. One could see this love on her family annual manatee trip. It was such a big part it was encompassed on her website. She especially enjoyed all the planning for the many family members that attended this year’s trip and keeping track of everything in her binder. I remember a Bears/Jaguars game she came into Chicago for. We got together with her cousins Tim, Renee and Mary Beth. She had so much fun!
Julie had a special respect for her brother and officer Doug. She was very proud of his accomplishments and his example towards others. I remember how excited she was to have her first real sister as her sister-in-law Karen. She would talk on and on about her nephews and nieces Katie, Matthew, Daniel, Emily and Jack. She loved the joy children brought to an everyday experience.
She had an equally special relationship with Brad who was her favorite roommate since college days. She was so excited when Brad found his wife Karen and even more excited when the lovely Kendall surprised and blessed their lives.
Most of all, she had a special love for Mike and his son Jeremy. In the many letters of correspondence, Julie wrote this to me in the beginning of her relationship with Mike.
February 1993
Mary,
I am still dating him. This is the longest relationship I think I ever had. We’ve been dating since January. We see each other almost every weekend now. Sometimes even during the week. I kissed him for the first time last Sunday. He sent me flowers on Tuesday. There were 6 roses; 4 were peach and 2 were red. Do you know about if that means anything? Like how yellow roses symbolize friendship and stuff like that. Anyhow, we are going to dinner Thursday and who knows what on for Friday. Saturday I am going to Daytona. And Sunday I’ll stop off in Ocala to tell mom all the “poop” on Mike. So far she thinks he’s ok. He rides motorcycles and he wants to take me on a road trip on the back of his bike. Cool, huh? Mom thinks so. Also, he scuba dives.
In a visit to Julie in Jacksonville, I remember walking into her bedroom and seeing Mrs. Beasley. This was surprising knowing Mrs. Beasley was gone after being attacked by terrorists when we were young. Julie told me that her boyfriend, Mike got it for her after a drastic search on the Internet. I knew right there that Mike was a good guy bringing Beasley back to protect Julie.
3rd GIFT: Her Exemplifying Life of Faith
Julie lived her faith. Her optimism and humor drew you towards her. In the summer of 2001, I had the opportunity to be further educated in Rome for the month of July. I traveled alone and knew no one. Phone calls were difficult due to 50 people per one phone and one computer. To insure that I wouldn’t feel to lonely, I digitally recorded my best friend Julie’s laughter and brought it with me. Every time I felt homesick, I turned on the recording to hear the music of her joy.
Recently, I had an opportunity to return the favor to her. I called Julie not knowing what to say but just to feel her presence. I placed the phone next to my son, Matty and tickled him. Soon, his giggles came blasting forth into the receiver to bring her a moment of joy.
She never preached to you but helped you by example. She made big plans and did not sweat the small stuff. On her wedding day she turned to all of us and asked, “Do you suppose I need jewelry?” Since we all agreed that she did, we stopped at K-Mart, wedding dress and all to pick up a few things. She, of course was barefoot, so I had to wash her feet before she went down the isle.
No matter what adventure Julie, Michelle, Carol and I looked forward to; we always cherished the times we shared our faith together at mass. It provided a recurring sense of security in times when my own faith wavered. Julie’s faith was strong. She accepted the crosses handed to her. Even as she drew ill, she did not complain about her infirmity but worried more about the pain of those she loved who cared and worried for her.
Conclusion
These are a few of the many gifts Julie has given me. I’m sure she has shared these and many more gifts with you; her carefree joy in life, her beautiful relationships with loved ones, and her exemplifying life of faith. And this is just the beginning of her life. So with fork in hand, I want to remind you that this life is just the beginning and the best is yet to come.